This post will not be funny. It will not be witty. It will not be sarcastic or hard-hearted, as per my usual. This post is a way for me to get some things out of my own head that I often keep in too much or hold onto for too long before they eventually are the root cause for me overreacting to a situation or blowing something entirely out of proportion, as I'm sure many of us are apt to do.
In fact, this will be a post of expression; expression of something I haven't considered a great deal until the last few days.
With the very recent passing of a friend, I was confronted with a situation I haven't ever put much thought into: "How am I going to react when I lose someone I truly care about?" I'll be honest. The list of people that I genuinely and whole-heartedly care for is very small. In fact, I would say the number is less than 10, which in and of itself is a sad state of affairs. That being said, this entire situation has me rethinking much of how I handle the people in my life on a day-to-day basis.
I think, as a society and as a people in general, that the world fosters a lifestyle that makes it much easier for us to treat people in the same manner in which we would treat batteries; we don't think much about them while they're viable or until we need them or they're no longer useful. It's easier to make up a reason to not answer a phone call or to go out to dinner with a friend. I am probably the most guilty person on the entire planet of this. It's not that I don't enjoy the company of others, but, rather, would stay in and be selfish with my time. Not that my time is any more or less important than someone else's. However, in staying in and blowing off an invitation from a friend, how many times have I denied them the opportunity to get something off of their chest that no one would listen to? How many times have I thrown away the chance to create a new memory with someone? How many times have I ignored what was a call for help when all someone needed was a friend to hear about a heartache or when they just needed the company of someone who they knew they could trust?
Recent events have made me confront this question and so many others. When I die, what will my friends say about me? That I was egotistical? Funny? Understanding? Inconsiderate? While people make the procession around the coffin, will they be stoic and uncaring? or will they be smiling through the tears as they reminisce about a memory that we'd shared just last week or 10 years ago? Who we are is defined inevitably by what we do, how we live, and, arguably most importantly, how we treat both those we care about as well as those that we do not.
Am I saying that I will, from this point forward, answer every call, respond to every text, and be a saint to my fullest ability? Absolutely not. It's not in my DNA. If you know me at all, you definitely can attest to this truth. What I am saying, however, is that I'm forced to reconsider who I am and the actions that come along with being me. I think if we all look deep, we could see that every one of us could use some adjusting now and then. As much as I'd like to think differently, I am just as guilty as anyone.
So, after reading this, if you find yourself considering my words sitting on the couch tonight, or if it sparks a discussion with your significant other, or if you simply decide to smile at the deli clerk tomorrow at the store because it looks like it could change their day, then I have done what I've set out to do.
As far as those few friends that we all hold nearest and dearest to our hearts; instead of tossing out those batteries, maybe it's just time to recharge them and make them a useful and meaningful part of our lives again.
[This post is specifically dedicated (and hopefully I have done her some justice, in some shape, form or fashion) to Sheri Lynn West. You will be missed, but not forgotten. My heart goes out to Josh West, their three beautiful children, Jeri Ann Moody, their parents, and their family and friends.]
In fact, this will be a post of expression; expression of something I haven't considered a great deal until the last few days.
With the very recent passing of a friend, I was confronted with a situation I haven't ever put much thought into: "How am I going to react when I lose someone I truly care about?" I'll be honest. The list of people that I genuinely and whole-heartedly care for is very small. In fact, I would say the number is less than 10, which in and of itself is a sad state of affairs. That being said, this entire situation has me rethinking much of how I handle the people in my life on a day-to-day basis.
I think, as a society and as a people in general, that the world fosters a lifestyle that makes it much easier for us to treat people in the same manner in which we would treat batteries; we don't think much about them while they're viable or until we need them or they're no longer useful. It's easier to make up a reason to not answer a phone call or to go out to dinner with a friend. I am probably the most guilty person on the entire planet of this. It's not that I don't enjoy the company of others, but, rather, would stay in and be selfish with my time. Not that my time is any more or less important than someone else's. However, in staying in and blowing off an invitation from a friend, how many times have I denied them the opportunity to get something off of their chest that no one would listen to? How many times have I thrown away the chance to create a new memory with someone? How many times have I ignored what was a call for help when all someone needed was a friend to hear about a heartache or when they just needed the company of someone who they knew they could trust?
Recent events have made me confront this question and so many others. When I die, what will my friends say about me? That I was egotistical? Funny? Understanding? Inconsiderate? While people make the procession around the coffin, will they be stoic and uncaring? or will they be smiling through the tears as they reminisce about a memory that we'd shared just last week or 10 years ago? Who we are is defined inevitably by what we do, how we live, and, arguably most importantly, how we treat both those we care about as well as those that we do not.
Am I saying that I will, from this point forward, answer every call, respond to every text, and be a saint to my fullest ability? Absolutely not. It's not in my DNA. If you know me at all, you definitely can attest to this truth. What I am saying, however, is that I'm forced to reconsider who I am and the actions that come along with being me. I think if we all look deep, we could see that every one of us could use some adjusting now and then. As much as I'd like to think differently, I am just as guilty as anyone.
So, after reading this, if you find yourself considering my words sitting on the couch tonight, or if it sparks a discussion with your significant other, or if you simply decide to smile at the deli clerk tomorrow at the store because it looks like it could change their day, then I have done what I've set out to do.
As far as those few friends that we all hold nearest and dearest to our hearts; instead of tossing out those batteries, maybe it's just time to recharge them and make them a useful and meaningful part of our lives again.
[This post is specifically dedicated (and hopefully I have done her some justice, in some shape, form or fashion) to Sheri Lynn West. You will be missed, but not forgotten. My heart goes out to Josh West, their three beautiful children, Jeri Ann Moody, their parents, and their family and friends.]
